Culture Shock: Part 3

OK so back to the culture shock article I read. Here is a bit more:

The first stage of culture shock is the honeymoon, or tourist stage; this is the fun part. This is the stage where everything is new and novel and exciting and fun and different and cute and quaint and happy, and all the quirky little cultural anomalies you run across make you smile. Since I actually entered the first stage of culture shock while we were still in the States, it did not take me very long after arriving in China (like, the next day) to go from happy little tourist to spoiled, ugly American. I went from "Aren't those pedicabs cute?" to being mad at all the pedicab drivers because they didn't speak English.

I went from being fascinated with China to being nauseated by the sight and smell of Sichuan food. I went from desperately wanting to learn the language to not being able to stand the infernal racket of their constant, unintelligible chattering, and of course there was no doubt in my mind that they were all always talking about me. As I moved into the third stage of culture shock, I began to reject everything that China and the Chinese had to offer.

This is an interesting part because we have experienced this same thing. It's funny when you look around and wake up and start missing the things you had in America. We have on more than one occasion thought people were talking about us knowing we were American. We have also realized how spoiled we were in the states. We start to see things we took for granted. At the same time however, we stopped appreciating the differences the this country has to offer. Like I said before, the stages of culture shock for us has been a roller coaster.

We miss some things, like the day I traveled for 3 and a half hours by metro to find the fixins to make chili...but oh man when it was done...we had a chili feast for 2 days. Then we had Thanksgiving miracle when we found popcorn. We get excited over a different set of things these days...usually it's little things that make us the happiest these days.

Then we see things that we love about being here. The fact you can get anywhere around such a big city by jumping on a number of different public transportation choices. You can travel city to city or just make a trip to an historical monument here in the city. The architecture is amazing and there is so much to see. We try to embrace their cultural differences and understand that we are in THEIR country. We have to play by their rules. This is challenging at times but we love being around the Russian people and listening to their beliefs and thoughts. It widens our thought process.

Happy Thanksgiving from the Motherland

It's a bit strange trying to celebrate Thanksgiving here in Russia. There's no pictures of pilgrims, or turkeys, or the cornstalks all tied together in neat little displays. No smell of turkey coming from the kitchen. There are no hints of it anywhere. Not that I expected there to be considering it's an American holiday. I do have a lot to be thankful for though.

I'm thankful that God is by my side first and foremost...I know that's so cliche...I sound like I'm giving a speech at an Oscar ceremony. Seriously though if it wasn't for Jesus Christ, I wouldn't be where I'm at.

I'm thankful for an awesome wife. I can't even begin to describe how much I love her. There are not enough words to describe how amazing she is to me and our children. On that note, I''m thankful for two awesome kids who are so smart and creative...not to mention well behaved. That's always a plus.

I'm thankful for all of my friends who have laughed with me, cried with me, and stood by my side through thick and thin. I'm thankful for having two parents who have showed me that love can surpass money any day...and there's always enough left over to get through tough times. I'm thankful to have a Pastor who is like a father to me and who has a heart like no one else I know. I'm thankful for the opportunity to serve the Lord in a foreign country. It has been a challenging and rewarding experience. I'm thankful for all the people whose prayers and support have made this possible. I can go on and on because I have so much to be thankful for.

Thank you Lord for all you have given me and all you have done for me. I only hope that I can be useful to you for all the rest of my days here on this earth. Use me for your glory...send me where you want me. I can lastly thank You for being faithful and trustworthy. You have never failed me. I have never been rich in my wallet but I have always been rich in my heart since I met you...and for this I am yours until I breathe my last breath.

Big family partners in Kommunar

Big family partners in Kommunar
Originally uploaded by From Russia With Love1

We had a meeting in a nearby city Kommunar yesterday. We have some friends that are partners with Big Family that does ministry in an orphanage in Gatchina. It was a great meeting. Good food, good company, and good progress. I love the people that work with Big Family. It's so nice being a part of such a caring organization. I can see God doing some cool things and it's encouraging to us. Max and Ira hosted us. They are a foster family with 9 kids. WOW! They are so brave to take on so many kids. They are awesome with all of them though and you can see that these kids love them so much.

Trip To Ukki

Ukki
Originally uploaded by From Russia With Love1

We went to an orphanage in Ukki this week. It was so nice to finally be able to start visiting. It seems to have been one thing after another that has kept us from going. God's timing is perfect though and we know now why He has halted our attempts to get started. It's awesome to see some of the big picture coming into focus. There's still a lot of pieces missing to the puzzle but we are starting to see an outlilne at least. To quote the great Hannible from the tv show The A-Team..."I love it when a plan comes together." It's encouraging to see glimpses of a purpose that we have been wondering about for months. Stay posted. As we see more, we'll share more. We are learning to trust Him in everything we do...from the mundane every day living to the big ministry decisions that will shape where we will be in the future.

Culture Shock: Part 2

Part 2 of the article:

When my husband's company offered him a job in China, we jumped at the chance. This would be the opportunity of a lifetime, a chance to see the world, a great way to experience a new, exciting and mysterious culture. And get paid for it!

I was really excited. The first thing I did was run down to the local bookstore and buy a whole bunch of books about China, the Chinese people and how to speak Chinese. I even hired a Chinese friend from Taiwan to teach us the language (and whose first lesson of course was to explain that Taiwanese Chinese was completely different from Mandarin Chinese, but fortunately for us he spoke both). We had a whole three weeks to get ready, and ready I was going to be. I would walk like they walked, talk like they talked and think like they thought. I would eat their food (I loved Chinese food!), drink their (warm) Tsingtao beer, dress like they dressed, dance like they danced, learn to sing kari-yucky (karaoke - the Chinese national past-time second only to staring at the foreigners) and sleep on a bamboo-grass mat.

(I can be really naive sometimes.)

I was going to China! Wow.

Things like this just didn't happen to people like me!

Those three weeks flew by, of course, and before I knew it we were getting off a plane in Chengdu, Sichuan. I had not yet figured out that Chinese food in China was not anything like Chinese food in America, and I had not yet developed a taste for warm beer. But I could say hello, thank you and goodbye in Chinese, I was excited and happy to be there, and I was more than ready, willing and able to start my new life in China. The honeymoon wasn't over yet, and I just didn't have a clue.

I can relate to the range of emotions going on in this woman's mind. We were thinking the same thing. We will learn to be Russians in any way we can. We thought we would fit right in. I realized however that the first thing I found was that I missed beef jerky and I wasn't able to switch to fish jerky...just one of the many things that are different. It's a shallow thought but I'm being honest. I can't say I was in deep thought over the cultural differences at first. we are learning to embrace the differences...some are wonderful...and some are annoying. I think it's not so much about becoming a Russian. I will always be a foreigner, no matter how long I stay here. I think it's more about accepting their way of life no matter how different it is.

At Church

At Church
Originally uploaded by From Russia With Love1

We had a visitor from the US. One of the Pastors we know from back home had some work to do here and we were able to get together and hang out. Pastor Grant works with a ministry called Russians Reaching Russians. It was awesome seeing him. He was able to bring a power converter for us as well. Jen was able to straighten her hair for the first time in over 3 months. For some reason the little power converter we had just wouldn't work with her flat iron. Yay for Jen!! I was also able to see my buddy Dennis as well. I haven't been able to see him since we moved here. It was nice.

Culture Shock: The Little Things Count in the Biggest Ways

I read this article on an expat site that was very insightful and encouraging to me. We didn't have any "formal" missionary training. This kind of training probably would have went over this exact topic. We prepared ourselves the best we could and dove into the water...the water being a foreign country. We are doing well I think with the occasional bumps here and there. Overall, I think we are adapting. Some days I love it and other days I wish I could hop on the next plane home. This is something we expected though. I think I'll do this article in a few pieces so as not to make one dreadfully long post.

So here goes the article:
One of the first things I noticed about China was that all the men carried purses and the women held hands. This phenomenon shot straight to the top of my list of "Weird World Wonders" and stayed there until a mere five minutes later, when I went looking for a bathroom at the airport and came face to face with my first squatty potty.

This was culture shock, pure and simple, and I was already moving from the first stage of it - the honeymoon, or tourist, stage, which I had entered before we ever left the States - into the second, the irritation-to-anger stage. Culture shock can mean many different things to many different people, and any kind of move - whether it be across town, across the country or across the planet - can create different kinds of trauma in different kinds of people. Kalvero Oberg first identified the five distinct stages of culture shock in 1958, and we know them today as:

* The honeymoon, or tourist, stage;
* The irritation-to-anger stage;
* The rejection/regression stage;
* The integration/assimilation stage;
* The reverse, or reentry, stage.

So here is a thought. we have been here a little over 3 months now. I have found us going around the honeymoon stage and the irritation to anger stage and a little bit in the rejection/regression stage, and then back to the honeymoon stage. At least we're not standing still. One of these days we will be back in America and missing Russia...

Princess Eve

Princess Eve
Originally uploaded by From Russia With Love1

Eve was princess for a day. We had her birthday party on Sunday. The royal dinner for the day was spaghetti and meatballs and garlic bread. We invited over a couple of friends and just hung out for the evening. It was nice to have the company after the mess with our wallet the day before. we have some great friends here that are such a blessing and encouragement to us. Eve got a cash register and the fairy stuff you see here. She also got a craft set to make bracelets. She got to spend more time on Nick.com than usual...she thought it was a pretty nice day. We did too...

Missing Home

I miss home from time to time. I get a bit homesick and I miss friends and family members. I think it's harder when one of the kids are having a rough day though. I found our daughter Eve staring out of the window this morning. She wasn't being her usual self if you know what I mean. Usually she's a pretty chipper person in the morning. Can I play? Can I have some breakfast? Can you color with me? Can I chase the dog around the flat a few times? You know...things that an eight year old likes to do. When we asked her what was wrong all she could spit out before the tears came was, "I miss home."

It's a hard part about being here. She has friends here that she adores. She always wants to see them and play with them. She looks forward to the next time she will see them...but she gets so homesick for her cousins and friends back home.

It passes and she's soon chasing our dog Piper around the flat again...it just tugs on our hearts to see our children hurting at all. It's something we have to work through and it stretches us to trust the Lord to comfort us. I know that this is part of the process and it grows us in ways we don't even see yet...but growing pains still ache.

A friend of ours has a quote on her facebook that says, "His purposes will ripen fast, Unfolding hour by hour, The bud may have a bitter taste, But sweet will be the flower!
From Hannah Hurnard-Hearing Heart. I like this quote because it is a pure message of hope when you are stepping into the unknown and needing some reassurance.

Moving to Canada

With Sasha and Natasha
Originally uploaded by From Russia With Love1

We met Sasha an Natasha in America. They've spoke at our church before. They used to live in Chicago and have been back in Russia for a few years now. They are moving to Canada this week. We've been able to hang out with them a couple times. It's been nice.

From Minister to Missionary

I'm finding myself kind of lost right now. For the last ten years I have been consumed with ministry. I have seen people come and go from the church. I've seen the walls change colors...a few times. I have seen staff move into new chapters of their own lives. I have seen more events come and go than I can count. I have played, cried, worshiped, laughed, sweat, bled, and lived ministry.

Switching gears from pastor to missionary has been a bit more challenging than I thought it would be. I guess I'm so used to preparing for the next thing. When one event would end, that just meant it was time to start planning the next one. I have no services to prepare for. I have no events to plan. I have no staff to cultivate. There is no discipleship class to teach. No late night gaming parties with the guys. I feel a little out of my element and like I'm a bit in limbo right now trying to figure out what it was I was supposed to be doing in the first place. I know this is where God wants us. I think I'm not having culture shock as much as I'm having ministry shock.

God gave us a rest when we got here. Believe me, we needed it. Ten years will wear a person out. I think we're rested now and ready to get to work. I just need to figure out to drive this missionary vehicle. It's like switching from an automatic to a stick shift and I'm grinding the gears a bit trying to figure it out. I guess being stubborn is a good thing sometimes because I won't give up easily.

Ian's Birthday

Ian's Birthday
Originally uploaded by From Russia With Love1

Our Son Ian turned thirteen yesterday. WOW!! We have a teenager. We had a couple friends over and let him choose what he wanted for dinner. He chose fried chicken, Mashed potatoes and gravy, and spinach. We had a nice time. He got a really cool engineer's compass, a decorative knife and a fishing pole. His sister Eve also wrapped some things for him...they were actually things that were his and she's had them in her room for awhile. Eve decorated the front room for his party. She's such a sweet little artistic sister. She actually said to me, "Daddy, I'm actually happy for Ian that it's his birthday. That surprises me because I'm usually mean about it." We had to laugh.

It's the first birthday we've celebrated as a family in Russia. Ian really had a great time and we were happy to see our son turn into a teenager while experiencing another culture...that's a cool thought.

Guests

Visitors
Originally uploaded by From Russia With Love1

We had guests this evening. Our friends from Lomonosov stopped in for tea. Andrew and Nastya were in St. Petersburg visiting Nasya's sister Ulia and they gave us a ring. We love it when we get to hang out with them. They're fun to be around.

Yep...Our God is Good!!

We got news today that our visa applications were accepted and we are good for another year. Praise God! The best part is that we don't even have to leave the country to get them renewed and it's only going to cost us about $250. The Ovir just extended our present visas. That is so awesome! Natalia, the director of the Swiss center, is still in disbelief that it actually happened. We are so excited about this news because it's one more testimony we have to build our faith and trust in the Lord that we're doing the right thing. Thanks for your prayers.

Walk in the Park

Walk in the Park
Originally uploaded by From Russia With Love1

It was so nice this evening that we decided to take a little walk in the park. The weather has been pretty rainy and the temperatures have been in the 40's. Today it was like 62. We were waiting for a plumber to come and fix our faucet because it's been leaking. It was so hard waiting because it was so nice out. We called our landlord to see what time he was going to come and she told us that he wouldn't be able to make it until Wednesday. So we were out the door. I love going to the park. It's so quiet and nice.

Churches

We've been visiting some friends at different churches around S. Petersburg. This is the church in Sosnovy Bor. We have some great friends there...like Leosha. I love to hook him up with new music from time to time. We really enjoy visiting with all of them there.


This is Misha Kotoff's church. It's probably the largest church in St. Petersburg. We visited his church Sunday. We liked it. They had a man from Finland speaking that morning. Our translator was with Ian in youth group and Jen was with Eve in Children's church. So there I was...hearing 2 languages...and I couldn't understand either one of them...it was interesting. The worship was great and Misha displays such a passion when he preaches.

Russian Graffiti

056
Originally uploaded by From Russia With Love1

I haven't seen any dead people yet but apparently someone has...and they wanted everyone to know.

Not Child Friendly

We had to get AIDS tests to renew our visas. Eve was not very happy about this at all. She kept asking me how it would feel and reminding me that she hated needles. She asked me afterwards, "Daddy, are you proud of me...I didn't scream." That's my girl. She was very brave. No screams, just a little bit of tears. It took 4 hours to get tests done. By the time you walk to the station, ride the metro (stop at this little shop and grab some of these yummy chocolate things that they call potatoes...yeah really, that's what they call them.) take the bus, and find the creepy place where they do the testing...get back on the bus, ride the metro, walk home from the station...you are now pretty wore out.

The place we had to go to was not very child friendly though. I thought, "Stven King must have designed this place. I didn't know he lived in Russia." (little known fact: We used to live close to Steven King and the town they filmed Pet Cemetery in was about 5 minutes from our house.)
This place is not very settling on a child's nerves when they know they will have to get stuck by a needle when they go inside. I was even creeped out by this place...definitely not child friendly.
Ian said this place looked like a level in the video game Half Life...I was looking over my shoulder the whole time after he told me that.

So that was our experience at a Russian Testing Center. I hope we don't have to do that any again any time soon. However, the test results are at the Ovir's office and we await their response. This has been an interesting experience, dealing with the Russian government and a lesson in faith building...hmm, I wonder if God is trying to teach us something??

We're Here

I never thought the day would get here and now we've been here for almost 2 months. We have internet now so we can post updates. I've never been a regular poster in my blogs but I will try to keep this updated with pics and thoughts on a regular basis. I told everyone that we would put in the original post about our visa situation on here so I will do that. I'll also put in the post we used in case you don't get our newsletters. Please sign up to be on our mailing list if you haven't already.

Original Post:
Our Registration got mixed up. We were told to register somewhere we shouldn’t have. Now we’re registered as tourists and not students. Yep, you read right…and we’re coming to find out that it’s more than just going to the Ovir (special division of Russian authorities) and asking, “Can you fix this?” We’ve been told (by Russians) that the Ovir is not human, they are machines. They have no emotions, no compassion, that they don’t care about our predicament. I do believe that our God is bigger than the Ovir though. Amen?! So what they are saying is that we have to start the whole visa process over again. In Russia that is very expensive. Then we have to leave the country to get our visas. We’ve been told we have to go back to America…or Finland…or Latvia…or Estonia. Pray that we get a solid affordable solution to this.

New Post:
When I first wrote this article we had an urgent prayer need. Our registration got mixed up and we were forced with the fact that we were going to have to leave the country and possibly come back to America to renew our visas. Jennifer urged me to meet with the Ovir to explain our situation. Long story short: Natalia, the director of the school went with me and we plead our case to the Ovir. Surprising our director the woman took the paperwork and said she would look into it. Natalia still told me not to be optimistic. Two days later we are in our language class when the director stuck here head in the door and said, “Congratulations, you’ll get your one year visas.” Can you say “We serve a God that does the impossible?” You can read the original article on our website under updates.

So this is a huge praise report. Please keep praying as the situation is still in the Ovir's hands. We had to get some testing done for the renewal and it was supposed to be in this afternoon. The results won't be back until tomorrow and we haven't heard anything today from the school. Pray that the Ovir will let this just pass through when we get ther results from the tests.

Some updates

Well...what has happened since our last update. We went to Massachusetts to speak at a slavic church. It was all Russian and we needed a translator to speak there. It was pretty cool. We went over to someone's house that evening and had tea. Now if you've ever been to Russia you would know that tea can mean a 7 course meal. That's what we got and it was deloicious! The Russian people are so hospitable. I love them. We met some really cool people and were able to make some contacts to help us when we get over there. On the way back to Ohio we stopped off at Niagra Falls. It was quite a nice pit stop.

We bought our plane tickets yesterday. Our apartment is lined up...and the visas are in process. Man this is really getting close. July 22nd is our launch date. Keep us in your prayers. we're nervous but know this is what God wants us to do.

Off to St. Pete

Today we're off to Russia for a preliminary trip to meet some of the folks we'll be working with over there. Jennifer's not going so I'm a bit bummed about that but Pastor Jim is going with me. It seems to be a pretty packed schedule. Sosnovy Bor, Kommunar, Luga, Ukki, St. Peterburg...all in 8 days. I am really looking forward to this trip. It will get my feet wet a bit because I will be on my own in St. Petersburg on Friday. I'm meeting with a man I met there who is a missionary with his family. He's given me some good advice and I'm looking forward to spending some time with him again. I'll try to post hwile I'm there if I get a chance.

Seperation Anxiety

Well...our sale is over. We decided not to have another one in 2 weeks. I'm not very fond of having sales. We actually didn't do too bad considering the blizzard and all. We sold most of it at rediculously low prices...but we got rid of alot of it. You never realize how much stuff you have until you decide to get rid of it all.

Why do we get so attatched to "things"? I found myself not wanting to let go of some things that I've grown to like alot. I mean we kept some of our most prized possessions, but most of what we've collected over the last 15 years had to go. I think it comes down to the fact that one man's trash is another man's treasure...or vise versa in this case. Everyone wants the deal of the century. We ended up giving alot of things away. That was a little hard. I felt like I was having seperation anxiety for my "stuff". It was wierd. The fact that we sold our bedroom suit for food stamps is a bit amuzing but it spends like cash in my house. What can ya do. On buyer backed out of buying it and the other wanted it but didn't have enough cash...so we sold it to them. we gotta eat too right!? I sold our computer as well so I need to get a laptop now. we didn't have any room in our new place to keep a desktop pc. That will have to happen soon because I'm now computerless. I feel lost without one.

I got some good news about the visa situation. It looks like we might be able to get a charitable work visa. The new law doesn't seem to be affecting those types of visas. That's great news! Pray that doesn't change over the next 4 months.

A Blizzard

We are trying to have a sale and liquidate all of our belongings and Ohio decides to go and have a blizzard. Thursday it was nice out and now it's snowing. That's Ohio weather for ya. We're probably going to try to have another sale in 2 weeks. That will be Easter weekend but I think we'll have it on Thursday, Friday and Saturday. We're moving in with Jennifer's Dad and will be there until we move in July. Pray that we can liquidate as much stuff as we can. That will make it easier on us.

This realization struck me the other day. we're trying to sell things pretty cheap to get rid of it...so we're basically selling our life here in this house for a laptop and a camcorder. Kind of puts it in perspective when I think about it like that. I need a nice laptop though so if anyone knows of any good deals on a laptop let me know. That's about it for now.

Dr. Jesse duplantis came to Springfield Monday night. He is one of my favorite preachers. We were able to set up a booth at the event. Thanks Pastor Kevin!! We had a few people sign up for our newsletter. I was a little discouraged though at the amount of interest. We were packing up to leave after the event was over when my pastor came up to me and says, "someone wants to meet you." No it wasn't Jesse Duplantis. He had to leave because they were trying to beat the snow storm that was about to hit. It was however one of his staff. She prayed for Jennifer and I and spoke some words from the Lord over us. It was much needed encouragement. She gave us her card and wanted us to keep in touch with her. come to find out, she has had a heart for Russia for aawhile now. I feel like if that was the only person God wanted us to meet up with there...then I'm cool with that.

Why do I find it hard to trust God at times. I feel like I always need a reminder from him that everything is going to be alright. He has told us time and time again that He has everything under control but I let myself be talked into believing that things are just going to fall apart or something. I wish I wasn't so thick headed about this. He has never let me down in the past so why would He start now.

Psalm 56:3
When I am afraid, I will trust in you.

Another Church Partner

We were able to speak at a local church this last weekend and it went great. We had a businessman donate the printing and mailing of all of our newsletters when we leave. That's awesome because I was just thinking about that the other day and wondering how we were going to be able to handle that. God is awesome. He's putting it all together for us. Just keep the visa process lifted up in your prayers.

Fundraiser Lunch

We had a fundraiser lunch at our church Sunday. We had a great turnout and made a pretty good profit. We served carnitas and shredded chicken with spanish rice and black bean soup. Yum yum! We even had salsa music playing to set the mood. I was very pleased with the turnout and we had alot of fun doing it. Thanks to everyone who helped make that happen. So now we have enough money for plane tickets and visas and such. We can get there but we still have a long way to go for the monthly support side of it. Pray that God brings partners on board with us.

Pennsylvania Trip

I firmed up a trip today to go to Pennsylvania and speak at a church in March. The directors of the ministry we are partnering with were able to get us into their church. That's a blessing. God has been creating quite a few opportunities to speak in churches in the area and even out of state. Pray that more churches become partners with us in this adventure.

Up To Speed

So I thought I would bring every one up to speed as far as where we're at in the whole process of preparing for our move. To start off, we've decided to step on board with a ministry called Big Family. Big family is an outreach ministry to Russian orphans in St. Petersburg and some of the surrounding areas.

We've been in contact with the directors of this organization for awhile now. God kept redirecting us back to them. Every time we would make a contact with someone in Russia it would lead back to Big Family. We felt drawn to them from the start.

We met the directors through our church. When they came out to spend some time with us (and make sure we weren't crazy) it just seemed to fit. It was an answer to our prayer that God would clarify our purpose over there. We're really excited to work with them and are looking forward to what God is going to do to build this relationship.

That's it for this post. I'm sure I'll have many more thoughts to put on here but I'll end for now.

Welcome!!

Welcome to our updates page. This is where we will keep all of you informed about what's going on with our move to Russia.